Anger towards sadness

(Paraphrased quote because I can't quite remember what it was, but you get the gist):

Because you my friend...are rich.

'If you have a home which will always have dinner, an education that does not depend on your ability to pay, a few close loved ones that will support you all the way, freedom to roam and to speak, then you my friend, are rich.'

And have no fucking reason to be sad.

This seems entirely hypocritical of me, especially since I've spent the better part of my blog posts moping and ranting particularly between 2011-2012, but I'm done with it.

I want to stop procrastinating. Over thinking, anxiety, coveting, dread, wondering about what could have been, and not being able to forgive is all procrastination. Where is it getting you? NOWHERE. I've now realised why, when during lows and panic attacks, people in general feel exhausted. It is the anxiety and mental thoughts which can drive you to the limit, torment you and drain you of all your energy. 

To be honest, if you're in the right, or the things that happened were completely out of your control and you had no cause in it whatsoever, you don't deserve to be upset. If one of your dearest died? Respect their death. Make them so proud that they wouldn't believe it. And come out stronger than you ever were before. If a friend is in trouble and you're worried? To put it bluntly, it's none of your business. But show them that you're there for them, or find help if they don't have the means to. And if you're in the wrong? Well go and correct your mistake. Now. Do you know what will happen when you do? Release. It doesn't matter the consequences, quit being a pussy and face them. What will fear do for you? Nothing. What will waiting do for you? Nothing. They can only make things worse. 

It makes me so sad to see people angry at life, just because those who were close to them, failed them. Or when people give up when they feel no one cares. Learn to accept mistakes, there's only so long you can beat yourself up about it. I'm definitely not trying to say people cannot be upset at all, cause hey, we're humans, and sometimes words do hurt more than sticks and stones. But when that starts to define you? Hell no. 

'Oh well, it's easy to say when you've recovered from anorexia and others. But it's not like you understand what it's like to cut yourself  or be raped or have your parents die or be constantly bullied in your life.'

One, you can never, ever, recover from anorexia. Once you get into it, it's always there. Which is why, I absolutely hate girls seeking attention by 'dabbling', but that's a whole other argument altogether. 

And well, I have cut myself. Once. But afterwards when I came to my senses and realised that if I kept going, there would only be deeper and longer. Much like anorexia, it is something which can easily turn into a vicious cycle and have been caused by much deeper and perhaps more serious problems. And you're right, I am eternally thankful that my parents have not yet died, nor have I been raped, and I don't think I could imagine the after effects of such horrific ordeals. For that I am eternally grateful. And it is understandable, if some people need a period of time to get all the upset and shock out of their system. But there has to come a point when you ask yourself, what next? Do I continue like this? Do I let them win? Am I now defined by this?

Recovery from anything is so hard. That cannot be denied. There will be countless times where you fall, and sometimes you just want go back down the slippery slope. Because after all, it is easier to fall instead of climb. And some times, some days will just seem too dark for any hope. But you can become stronger. It doesn't matter what you've been through. You deserve to be this. Have respect for yourself. Just remember, that once you're through, and you've reached the finishing line, no matter what anyone yes, you've won a bloody gold medal and more.

تبقى قوية

Mantente fuerte

Մնա ուժեղ

强留

kukaa imara

強いままでいる

Blijf sterk

However, instead of sadness, you do have reason to be angry at the world. 

To be angry that they wealth of the top 3% in the world is the same as the bottom 97%. That means a couple hundred thousand of people have the same as BILLIONS. To be angry that the truth isn't told. To be angry that some people are killed, disgraced and imprisoned for their race, sexuality and less. To be horrified that concentration camps in North Korea have 'guard dog training', whereby packs of dogs are set on innocent prisoners, usually children, in order to 'train' them, and are rewarded for prolonged pain and tormentation. The children are either left completely savaged with faces ripped off and perhaps missing organs or bleeding to death. To be angry that although this sounds bad, there are probably things much worse that have been hidden, and we just don't know about. 

Do you these people chose to be said colour, race or sexuality? No. But don't just sit there with this anger. Do something. Make someone's darkness, beautiful. To realise that you have forever changed someone's life for the better is incredible. It can be anything from donating to give a child an education, or campaigning for an end to trafficking. Put your past into use. Experience is gold. 

If you need any more help, maybe this will help:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJvEoLPLIg8

But please don't lose yourself because of the past. Don't feel that no one cares about what happens to you. Because I care. Doesn't matter if you know me or not in real life. You have the potential for everything and beyond. You have the potential/already are, someone's world. Don't go destroying that. For any help, feel free to contact me on here or leave a comment. 

Song of the Day
Our own Versailles by Galt Aureus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8fgWs5mFmoM
Unfortunately I can't seem to find a video for you guys without the introduction, however, I'm acbsolutely loving this band! I found it as it was the backing track on a Photoshop tutorial and I'm loving their music! Some of their videos only have a few thousand views (might just be and the replay button...) but you should definitely check them out. They're definitely gonna be big!

בלייַבן שטאַרק

Μείνετε ισχυρή

꿋꿋

Bleiben Sie stark

Restez forts

rimanere forte

Stay strong.

Youtube extras and features! Yay or nay?

I was looking for a way to make my blog posts even more helpful and I've decided that I will be adding new Youtube featurettes and extras which might be useful to you! They might be directly targeting the blog post, or they might be a different but with a similar theme. For example, the first pilot video is for the Oliver Bonas shop feauturette I did, and in this featurette I'll be showing you one of my jewellery stands/collections which does have a few of the products in the post. Really hope that you guys enjoy it! 

The videos will be embedded directly into the post for easy navigation *crosses fingers that it works* And so, here's the first video! *excitement* 

What do you guys think? Leave comments below! Should I do more of these? Do they help? Some feedback would be really appreciated! I've yet to work out a timetable that can juggle blog posts and videos, but now that it's the summer, I'll be able to do lots of these! 

Song of the Day:
Player by Naomi King
I found this girl whilst looking at Manic Panic hair dye reviews a few months back, but this still remains one of my favourite songs by her! She's so talented, and seems very genuine as well as being a very cool chick. And hair is amazing! I'd love to be able to dye my hair in such brilliant ways! 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=467MA6BI_AY

There is no great flood. These animals need to be freed.

Many types of zoo now exist, from the petting zoos that encourage the public to get up and close with the animals, to the large ‘safaris’ that provide space for people to roam around within. And most famously the  urban zoos such as London Zoo which include elephants, lions and penguins and are usually notable tourist draw cards for the cities concerned.

However these animals are being subjected to being tormented by ogling tourists with their gaggles of screaming children; people who seem to not understand the simple ‘do not feed’ statement present in every zoo; and confinement for the rest of their lives. Often clouded by the nostalgia of childhood reminisces, these cruel institutions are far from so.

They are suffering in zoos just for our own amusement. As well this, it is common for visitors to tease and provoke caged animals. Deprived of their natural habitat, the animals are then thrust into the bitter limelight of forced proximity with humans, an unnatural and destructive scenario. This factor alone has caused many animals to die due to unfamiliar parasites and diseases from humans and the unsuitable climates. Was it really a good idea to have a polar bear in a zoo in Florida? Or in fact, any state or country that simply cannot replicate the original surroundings and climate of the animal?

A study of British zoos found that elephant enclosures were over 1000 times smaller than their natural habitats. They suffer psychological distress, which is often displayed by abnormal or self-destructive behaviour. Aquatic animals such as whales do not have nearly enough water, birds are prevented from flying away by having their wings clipped and being kept in aviaries. Furthermore, the locations of zoos in urban areas leads to incidents like the urban foxes’ attack at London Zoo in 2010 that killed 11 South African and Rockhopper penguins. An esteemed establishment that was London zoo was unable to prevent the destruction caused by these other animals.

No matter how we may try to replicate their habitats in a zoo, we will never achieve the full result. Predators need to hunt and taking from them their ability to do so by taming, caging or drugging them is beyond cruel; depriving them of their natural social structure and companionship. A study by the journal Science in 2008 found that 'Asian elephants in European zoos had a median lifespan of just 18.9 years compared to 41.7 years for wild elephants in an Asian logging camp. We are subjecting them to a much lower quality of life with very little to gain. Territorial fights between animals have also lead to the death of several animals due to cramped conditions especially amongst rare big cats and large mammals; as they become bored, depressed and institutionalized.

Some zoos have also killed their animals purposely because they regard them as 'excess animals'. Excess animals are caused by poor planning in zoos in breeding programmes that produce for more offspring than expected and thus creating surplus animals. In a herd of lions only a few males are required to service the females; this leads often to the sale of the excess males to inappropriate establishments. The two most controversial options are using surplus animals for legitimate medical research and, failing that, culling. It is like having China’s one child policy all over again.

The press have often been criticized for the uproar it causes as it publicizes these failures, however, more talk is being created against the media's way of getting the message across, rather than the actual message itself. And could it really be such a big uproar, that less than a third of zoo-goers do not know what culling even is?

Government funded zoos are often started and continually supported by city tax money. An increase in revenue for services such as better healthcare in hospitals and education in schools could easily be ensued by removing these establishments. Providing a large carnivore such as a tiger with food, shelter, keeper time, and veterinary care during its lifetime can cost a minimum of $25,000, according to Dr. Lewandowski. Primates are also  usually more expensive to maintain, he added. This does not include the care of rare animals and require the further cost of a specific trade and care licence (i.e. Pandas from China). 

Where animals are rare and hard to breed in captivity (for example, the Giant Panda), removing specimens from the wild to zoos may result in population falling. The procedure of breeding is both costly and unsuccessful. Although conservation programmes generate a lot of good publicity for a zoo, they in fact often do not result in a high success rate – many species are going extinct each week despite the good intentions of some zoos. This is partly because a very small captive community of a species is more prone to inter-breeding and birth defects from the very unvaried gene pool, a problem which the animals would evidently not have in the wild.

Many zoos are unable to keep a large enough number of individuals to provide a sufficiently varied gene pool for the species to breed without problems. As well as this, the benefits to the overall species population do not compensate the individual animals for the negative effects of living in a zoo. Returning successfully bred animals to the wild itself is a difficult procedure, as the animals become dependent on humans and institutionalized, leaving them weaker than if they had been left to thrive for themselves in the wild.

Zoos are said to spread awareness and educate people from an early stage on animals including their behaviour and habits. With this aspect, zoos are not educational as they only teach us how an animal behaves in small, confined spaces, at the mercy of humans. Statistics have also shown that the average zoo-goer knows less about animals than those who claim an interest in animals, like fishermen, and little more than those who claim no interest at all or students who grasp basic knowledge from school lessons. The education lessons obtained from zoos could just as effectively, and more humanely, be presented in the classroom. Animals should be left in their natural surroundings and not used as tools for public entertainment.

Would we accept a human being subjugated to these conditions? With our DNA 96% identical to a chimpanzee; an animal often seen behind the zoo bars, why not us as well? With the human race also deriving as a mutation in genes from chimps, does this mean we would have to be worth less and so treated less? In theory it should. With so little difference genetically and socially, why must they be imprisoned against their will?

As well as this, there is now an increased rate of animals dying from an increased use of medical drugs that are both more complex and stronger than before. Zoo animals are often exposed to chemicals, solvents and other toxic substances. And excessive human involvement by humans has caused major disruption in food chains, interfering with integral ecosystems. Zoos fail to treat animals with the respect that they deserve, and violates the animals' right to live and it treats them as a simple means to achieve some human end, whether it be for profit or ‘education.’

Charities such as the WSPA work towards true conservation and protection of animals as they campaign against poaching, illegal hunting with a slow but steady successes. They have aimed to remove the imminent problem head on without the need for alienating random animals and sending them to cells. However, a higher percentage of funding goes into zoos than all of these charities put together. As we fund into this twisted parody of a utopia that are zoos, is it not just a matter of time before each visitor begins to have more blood on their hands than the hunters and poachers themselves?

Even Noah’s Ark lasted for just 40 days, and it should not happen again.

___________________________________________________________________________________

This was an article written by me as an English assignment when I was 13. I found it whilst cleaning out my computer :) I've got 16 exams in the next 5 days and so I've been so busy with revision! I didn't want to leave you guys without a blog entry this week and I thought that you might find this interesting. What are your opinions on this topic?

Disclaimer: This article may reflect some of my views but not all. It must be remembered that this was an English assignment, something I do for homework. It's not a speech or a campaign but a way for me to practice my argumentative writing skills when I was thirteen.

Song of the Day:

Everything at once by Lenka

Hooked on this song ever since I heard it on the Windows advert. Not sure what I think about the beginning but damn it's a catchy song once it gets into your head.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tfy5CBfjZ8s

Barcelona

'The great book, always open and which we should make an effort to read, is that of Nature.' -Antoni Gaudí

As some of you will know from reading a few blog posts ago, was that I spent a great week in Barcelona! It was my second time going there and my fifth time going to Spain overall. My first time was on a school trip, and at first I was a little reluctant about having to go to almost all the places I had visited before and pay for them again, but I actually really, really recommend it! The trip passed in a mainly dreamy haze, filled with memories of having fun with my friends but since they were faint, it was still all seemed quite new to me.

If you're planning a trip to Barcelona, here are just a few places you should definitely go and see:

1. La Sagrada Familia

This is probably the most obvious of all venues; first thing most people think about it when going to Barcelona, is the Sagrada Familia. But why have I pointed out such a painfully obvious tourist attraction? It's because most people only go in there, look around the main cathedral, and then leave. No. Don't do this. For any venue of that matter. At the back of the Cathedral is a side door which leads to a small Gaudi exhibition  which shows what inspired everything. Those columns? They're tree trunks leading up to a glorious canopy of flower and leaf inspired tops. It's really a lot more interesting than I ever expected and is perfect for budding architects or even the experienced veteran!

Canopy of wow. 

If you go down towards the direction of the toilets, there's a door which leads to yet another one of their exhibitions regarding the restoration of Sagrada Familia. There are lots of cool displays with real models which Gaudi used, a room full of paintings of the Sagrada Familia (without all the cranes of course) and an observatory where you can have a look at Gaudi's tomb. The exhibition also contains a lot on Gaudi's life and there is a small cinema where you can watch a 20 minute film about the construction and design of the great church. 

2. Parc Guell

The small pathways are often the most scenic
and beautiful

Without a doubt the best park I've visited so far! And you really have to visit when it's sunny, I think part of the Spanish magic are seeing the dry, terracotta tiles and sandy dust around. If you have a time spare, you could really spend the best part of a day strolling around the park. And you can wonder off the beaten path and climb to the top of the many small mountain peaks for some incredible panoramic views and silhouette photos. 

There are lots of vendors. A tip to go by, don't buy sunglasses for any more than €4 and always haggle for everything else! The street sellers near the entrance usually have particularly higher rates so wait a bit til you've wandered through. And have no fear about getting lost because when you get there, you'll see that it has been arranged in a way so that all the main paths lead to or surround the main plaza which leads to the main entrance/exit. I loved going through this wonderful park with it's open air tunnels but definitely remember to bring sunscreen and lots of water as there is a lot of climbing to do especially when you're trying to reach the park itself! 

Gaudi's house is also available to look at as a museum, however it seemed silly to pay almost €10 to be cooped indoors. 

3. The beaches of Barcelona

Are all nude-friendly. I'm not kidding. The beaches are very much a concentration gradient of nudity. The beaches closer to the main stations such as Barceloneta are mainly tourists and so most people are clothed. However when I first visited, a couple beside us decided to give us a show even though we were right at the 'clothed' end and no one seemed to think this was out of the ordinary. However, if you walk along the beach towards the World Trade Center, you just see people wearing less...and less...clothing.

Restaurants are very much a big feature of the beaches. However they're very expensive and very exploitative of tourists. I've heard a few nightmares regarding hidden surcharges and food that isn't really Spanish. And so I highly recommend Restuaurant Carballeira. It's only a 2-3 minute walk from Barceloneta however it's tucked in between houses and so very few tourists go there. You will recognise it as a brown shop front on your left side.

Both times we went to the beach, we went to Restaurant Carballeira. It's a very cool, relaxed atmosphere with a great fish display inside. There is no phoney Spanish music and the waiters are very welcoming and polite, although they were quite surprised to find tourists at their hotel! They do however speak fluent English much to our surprise and delight. I recommend their grilled line-caught hake. The fish is cooked in such a soft and simple way! Plus their sorbets are amazing. The only downfall however was their Crema Catalana dessert which is basically crème brûlée, it was served cold and was of a lot larger size than any two people could take. The crème part of the Crema Catalana really was a bit too thick, however since all their other food tasted sublime, I'll put this down as a fluke.

(A) shows the location of Restaurant Carballeira

If you don't fancy walking all the way back to Barceloneta and you'd prefer something closer to the beach, Casa Pinxo is also a very nice restaurant and it can found on the main port which leads to the beaches. They have free wi-fi as well ^.^ Most of the portions there are big enough so that you can have a meal of tapas. However, it is a bit more expensive than Carballeira as a dinner for two cost us about €60. 

WARNING. Do not get henna done for you at the beach. It is overly expensive even if you haggle and they use cheap black henna hair dye to draw on your hand. Most of the salesman are unskilled and use a template  to draw on your hand which is ridiculous as the asking price is around €15 for a small part of your hand. Thankfully I did not have an allergic reaction to this procedure. However if you google black henna, you can see all of the nightmarish blisters and reactions people have had and I am so relieved that it did not happen to me otherwise it would have turned a brilliant holiday horrific. Allergic reactions can be anything from blisters that last for weeks to ones that leave permanent scarring and actual organ damage. It is very toxic and not very well managed in coastal areas such as Barcelona. Please research this for yourself and be careful! 

4. La Rambla Del Mar

Is this brilliant sprawling port. It's a perfect place to cool down in the early even when it's still warm and there's a slight sea breeze. You can sit on the wooden floor of the port and dangle your feet off the edge. There are lots of bobbing statues as well which seem to change every year. The shopping and food centre at the end of it however is ridiculously expensive, you're much better off going to the main shopping street of Las Ramblas which is directly in front of the port and grabbing a fruity snack from La Boqueria. 

La Rambla del Mar

Obviously I haven't even gotten near to talking about all the wonderful sights of Barcelona, however the most important thing is to take your time through each venue. Only then can you actually enjoy them. Go early to the Sagrada Familia (best time is to arrive at about 9.45am or before) and then walk to La Pedrera. By then it will be lunchtime and so the line isn't as long as it usually is (perhaps an hour instead of two). But the best thing to do is before you go, buy the tickets beforehand online at home, and then you can print them out. We didn't mind waiting in line, however. If you buy tickets online you have to book a time and it seemed a little stressful for us to be rushing from place to place to make appointments. 

Hope that your trip to Barcelona is sunny and brilliant!

If you'd like for me to do a post on my timetable in Barcelona I'd be more than happy to, leave a comment down below telling me about what you've done in Barcelona! I'd love to hear about all your memories and experiences!

Entrance to La Boqueria

All credit for the Sagrada Familia ceiling picture and La Rambla del Mar goes to their respective owners and publishers. All other photos are my own.

Song of the Day:
La Camisa Negra by Juanes 
One of my favourite Spanish songs! It's a bitter song about love, but it's just so dang catchy! The video although a little strange, is quite cool as well. I adore the acoustic guitar; I can't really think of another instrument that sounds so beautifully Spanish. A nice line is 'Hoy me sabe a pura mier-'
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRt2sRyup6A

Inside La Boqueria

One of the many street artists you can find on the street of Las Ramblas

Shop feature: Oliver bonas

Welcome to the Shop Feature series! Every month or so, I plan to do a feature on a shop I have really been liking. It will be a shop I will have purchased regularly from and have high quality items. The requirements for the shop include consistently good customer service, easy buying process and preferably an online website so viewers unable to reach their stores can buy them! Perhaps they were be well-known stores, or sometimes the smaller, but nonetheless brilliant alley shops with hidden treasures. If you have any requests for any stores you'd like me to have a look at, feel free to leave a comment below :)

One shop I've really been loving nowadays is Oliver Bonas. They sell everything from furniture to jewellery, clothing to homewares; however in this segment I will be focusing on their jewellery. Oliver Bonas perfect if you are stuck for gift ideas for that special lady or friend. All the jewellery I have purchased from them is of the highest quality. They are all sturdily made and I have had no complaints. The online website offers international delivery at very reasonable prices so everybody can access them! Here are just a few products which I have bought/received and some which I'm planning to!  

These Marcasite Dove Earrings, are among one of my favourite purchases from Oliver Bonas! I spent a while trying to find these in store after after visiting a few shops I finally found the last remaining one at One New Change! They do seem to be readily available however online, which I suppose would have been the easier option...

They're a good size at 1.2cm x 1cm and I've received lots of compliments about them when I wear my hair up! Bigger earrings create a bigger impact and this really stands out against any skin tone! HIGHLY RECOMMENDED <3 

The next pair of earrings I have also bought. They are perfect for everyday wear. They come in three colours (pink, purple and turquoise). These birdy studs were smaller than I thought, definitely smaller than the pair above but they're just such sweet earrings! They would make a great gift to perhaps a young girl who has just had her ears freshly pierced! My ears are highly sensitive to metal that isn't properly oxidised or of low quality and these were definitely no problem.

The next earrings I'm hoping to buy...but I always need to check them out in store first. It's always annoying when they online photo looks different from the actual thing, but Oliver Bonas usually have it turn out for the better! Which colour Lina earrings do you think should I get? The green looks like it would be a great pop of colour with a black dress but the grey looks effortlessly cool and vintage. Leave a comment below and I'll buy which one has the most votes! 

The Juju Alphabet bracelet is something I normally would not buy for myself. And so I received this as a birthday gift from a friend a couple weeks ago! It's so dainty and small, and they would make great friendship bracelets! However I have been warned, that since the thread is made from silk, frequent contact with water will cause they fibers to break as they are very delicate. Each letter charm is tiny, however it's the little heart at the back which wins me over! Really delicate and handcrafted, it's definitely a sweet gift to show you care.

Available in baby pink or black silk thread- there are more options in store

And where would my blog post be without statement necklaces? I'm a sucker for pendants and so these Ocean Triangle and Bambie necklaces just screamed at me! The extra effort to create a matching chain to the triangle necklace is much appreciated! This is however a very long necklace. I had to shorten it to almost half it's length. Not because it looked bad, I just though it looked better against a little black dress if it was hanging just above the chest. I supposed it's not the most versatile of pieces but it's a great way to make a statement without something being too big or complex. 

The Bambie necklace was a dream find! And at only £9, it was a steal! This would probably be a better suited gift to someone in their late teens or younger, but I love these type of necklaces! Gold goes well with so many colours and it can be styled in so many different ways! Modern with a short black dress, vintage with a deep purple evening gown, or rustic with a faded grey/brown jumper. 

The next to necklaces I'm hoping to buy. I think this Silver Birds on a Branch necklace would look great against a plain colour top. Trust me to plan my outfits around necklaces and not the other way round! It's a pricier than the other necklaces at . Perhaps a very early birthday gift I could perhaps 'subtly' hint at?

It's sweet and simple. I'd wear this Valentine's Day. It's got the theme of love and companionship without being overly lovey dovey, commercialist or just generally sickening. Hey, I'm all for the season, but I think wearing a red dress with pink polka dot hearts with a rose necklace is a bit much for me thank you very much.

The Mia Long Necklace is even longer than the Ocean Triangle! It's almost a metre length of non-adjustablechain. This is one which I would definitely have to try on in the store as I'm quite wary of overly long necklaces. Always measure before you buy :) 

However all the charms on the necklace look carefully made. I've looked around for some internet reviews and I haven't heard anything about them coming off or breaking which is a problem I've had with some long necklaces of purchases past. Can't wait to see it on my next trip to the store! 

That's all I have for this week, got my exams in just two weeks! So nervous! Wasn't able to do much revision at all doing this post. Oh well. Hope everyonehas fun over their May bank holiday and stay safe! Like I said before, this store has so much more to offer than just jewellery. If you have one near you I highly recommend it. I remember the first time I visited one of the stores, my first thought was that it was very 'clean.' As you can tell they specialise in modern and simple type items, but it's very easy to find yourself browsing through for hours over their scented candles, affillated make up, jackets, cushions, and then realise with glee that you still haven't even covered half of it! See you until next week! 

Here's a YouTube feature I actually did on this!



Song of the Day:
Midnight City by M83
This song just makes me reminisce about Made in Chelsea! It's been their theme tune for three  of the five seasons. The others were called 'Punching in a Dream' by The Naked and Famous and 'New France' by Orbital, but I'm not as fond of them, but apparently they grow on some people, so you should check them out as well! 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dX3k_QDnzHE

Instagram, Twitter and all that is connectivity!

 Just decided to do a post on all my links :) It's a little experiment where I have no specific title for this and barely any ideas. And so this brings in my rambling, and god knows where that'll take us. But may as well get all the business-y stuff and contact details sorted out first. This is just so, that if anyone wants to find out more, and I've failed to put up the appropriate widgets, I can just link whomever is asking to this post!

On the left as you can see are some of my Instagram photos in no particular order, mainly just to show you and perhaps provide some eye pleasers during this post xD My Instagram name is @thispiggyhaswings

I've attempted to organise and set up this blog page a bit more, and so far I've added the 'follow me' widgets for my Twitter and Instagram of the right-hand side of the page. Hopefully it works??! I'm so bad with tech it's ridiculous :')

Next is my Twitter:

@fackinghell

My deviantArt:

www.x-akiyamamio-x.deviantart.com

(If there is anyone wondering what a deviantart is, it is just a site for artists to share their work. I love the site! You get to crtique other people as well as showcasing your own work! It basically introduced to me the world of commisions, art competitions and much more! I've learnt a lot from being on this site, even though my art is nowhere near as good as most of these artists. Anything can be displayed here! From Etsy crafts you wish to sell to digital art, traditional, collages, etc. Plus you can always sell your art to people in the form of various paraphernalia such as calendars, cups etc.)

I used to have a YouTube account, but then I thought it would be getting too much if I started needing to manage regular blog posts and YouTube videos, especially as it gets closer to my exams, and it's just something I do for fun here and there!

Are there any other websites I've missed? I don't think so. If any more do come up, then I'll definitely update this. Thanks to all who have supported me!

Song of the Day:
Fall Out Boy and Alicia Keys cover by Christina Grimmie and Mike Tompkins
Mike Tompkins is well known across YouTube for his ability to replicate what many would assume to be electronic sounds with his own voice and mouth and nothing else. He has a great singing voice as well!

In this video he's recorded and stored some of his 'sounds' and so he can instantly loop and play them back for this song. And this cover of the two combined just sounds incredible! I've really been loving mashups at the moment and this is just one of my favourites.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZXRgRkwkIQ

Favourite Tweet of the Day:

Being ill

Really sucks.

Until a few days ago, I had been lying in bed almost permanently because it felt like WW3 was being raged in my body. At one point, my fever reached 40.5 degrees Celsius! And this all started on my birthday. My birthday was the last day of the school term, and for it, one of my friends gave me a raging fever by accidentally coughing directly onto my face. This was particularly bad as I'm quite a germphobe, and when she did, a little part of me died inside.

I probably looked a little something like this

But now I am alive. But jittery. You know that post I had about the multitasking and needing to use my time as best as possible to it's 'full efficiency'? Yeah, well imagine a whole week of me having to stay at home, in bed. Because it hurt to look at a screen for more than a few seconds. Because I didn't have the energy to stand up let alone go out. I couldn't even be awake for more than a few hours at a time without needing to go back to sleep, even if the time I was awake, I was just lying in bed. And this has given me really strong, anxious jitters. I had been looking forward to my Easter holidays for so long. I had planned days out, sleepovers, a friend's laser tag party etc. I even planned a proper study schedule as well (every other day). But that all went out the window and I feel like I've just wasted my whole holiday.

I go to Barcelona next week, and then I'm back to school. Words can't describe how angry I feel towards myself at the moment for being so ill. I feel so useless, and even to the point of disgust at myself because I've wasted so much time. I've never really been ill for longer than 2 or 3 days at the most, and so this was quite the shock. Part of me knows that it wasn't really my fault, at least not entirely. Hopefully I can begin to accept that over the next week, and I'm really sorry guys for not being able to post for so long. Best wishes to the health of you and your loved ones :)

Song of the Day: 

My Immortal guitar cover by Sungha Jung

He plays the guitar just so well! It starts off sad, but I feel that Sungha Jung ends it well by making sure it isn't depressing but still beautiful. It's hard to explain, so have a listen and decide for yourself!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5J4A6kvoYaA

Tweet of the Day:

Multitasking

Multitasking. Now this is something I do a lot of. Whenever I am on the computer, I am always looking at two things on once. I will adjust half my screen to fit YouTube or 4oD, and on my right side will be one internet window with about 20 tabs, which include all the things I need to do. For example email messages that need replying, Duke of Edinburgh entries that need writing, my Facebook, research for a paper that needs to be done, blog posts that need writing ;) etc. This sort of gives me a sense of urgency whenever I go on the computer. It isn't relaxing for me. It isn't a break really. It's more a long to-do list which is somewhat enjoyable but not really where I can let go.

I, however, am not a balding man . 

This is because I can't bare to let myself relax. To give myself up to just under an hour of relaxation everyday. In my mind I have to be using my time to its greatest efficiency. So even if I am watching How I Met Your Mother or a makeup tutorial on Youtube, I have to be something productive in the mean time. I mean, how dare I do something which relies on my mind to be numb for a few minutes. Otherwise I just become a waste of space, right?

To give a sense of how extreme it can get, I'll show you EXACTLY what I'm doing now.

1. Writing a blog
2. Typing
3. Muted the ad for Revenge (great show!!) so that I can
4. Listen to music during it.
5. Eating an orange
6. Getting annoyed at my headphones cause one of the speakers within has come loose so it makes a rattling noise when I move my head D:
7. Get worried at how I have to start homework in 7 minutes

Looking back on this list, I can see how stressful it looks. But this

Ir's been bred into my current environment that knowledge is everything. Life is a competitive and painful thing, and if you slack off, you are going to fail in life. And so every moment, must be used. Combine this with my twisted version of carpe diem, every wasted moment is a failure. I guess it softens my first statement, with the fact that these moments can also be used for moments of pure joy, but it gives extremes. Either extreme happiness or extreme studiousness.

I really need to chill the fuck down.

What sort of things do you guys like to multitask? Perhaps I'm not the only odd, stressed out person :)

Song of the Day
Ho Hey by the Lumineers
The chorus is quite catchy. This is also the song which I was listening to whilst watching Revenge. I guess this is what some people would call 'hipster' but I couldn't really give a crap either way. I listen to music because I like it, not because it falls any particular category. Plus I've heard this song reach #6 on Capital FM Big Top 40, does that mean it's not hipster anymore? Silly earthlings.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x8311YhEEbU


Tweet of the Day

An amazing achievement <3 I'm so glad this has gone through! Found this on 11.03.13

Hacked account

I've been on GaiaOnline for 5 years now. You see, since I'm quite young, that's quite a significant chunk of my life. It's true that whilst I was working towards my 11+ exams and a little afterwards, I went on it only few times, especially since my school friends stopped using it as well. But it was still a nice part to log onto it. Just like Wonderland Online, it was a part of my childhood happiness, and like many other pieces I keep trying to keep a hold of. I know I'll have to let go eventually, but it's just quite nice holding onto everything for just that little bit longer. After all, what everyone wants is a little slice of happiness right? :)

But on February 16 it all changed :( I looked on my account, and I saw that I had a few private messages. Strange, because I remembered that I hadn't replied to the ones I had before. But then I realised they were notifications for me selling stuff on the website marketplace. Then I looked at my gold balance. From about 2,600,000g to 932g. Utter shock is the only way I could describe it. Basically, my hacker had sold all my 'higher' items (i.e ones above the value of 100k), sold them VERY cheaply (so a 2mil item would be sold for 200k) in order to generate quick cash. Then they used my account to buy an item (usually 2g) for 3.2 million D:< And this way I wouldn't be able to track who this person was. Sucks.

I've reported it now, now all I can do is wait and see if I can get any of it back :3

I'm just glad I'm not like those 'vendors' on the site. Basically, they like to buy hundreds of one item and then sell them a few weeks, months, or years later when the items value in the user marketplace rises. Most of the time the profits are marginal which is why they have to sell in vast quantities. But sometimes (especially with evolving items), they can receive massive profits. However this often results in a user who is constantly on Gaia buying and selling, keeping a close eye on marketplace changes. Sounds too tiring to me for online money.

Song of the Day
Hall of Fame by The Script ft. Will.I.Am
Can't believe I've never put this song on here before! It's a great motivational song <3 Have a listen, you won't regret it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mk48xRzuNvA

Tweet of the Day

Apprehension

Deep breath. Deeps breaths. Or so I keep telling myself to do. I'm very much nervous for the Easter holidays. Because after Easter, begins the intense, utterly suffocating revising. Every teacher is talking about exams until they become your constant and only  thought :// It's a claustrophobic time, and with the ever-growing pressure of this necessity to succeed; it seems that it can only get worse. Girls have a tendency to think ahead more than boys. And so right now I'm thinking  that if I don't pass my end of year exams I will not only disapooint my parents, but my teachers as well. And this will be a reflection of my GCSE results. If I fail those I won't get into a good university, I won't have a good job, I won't have any money, no one will love me because I'm such a failure and I won't find happiness in life- because of these exams. Even I can see, that this is a bit of an over-reaction, but this is the poison that fuels my anxiety.

And exams week should be known as Doomsweek in my opinion. This may seem overly dramatic, especially those who are lucky enough not to have this crippling fear. But I'm really. Really. Really. Bad with exams. I fainted during one of my SATs :') I shake and tremble going to the exam room. I can barely speak because my throat is choked up with fear. It's awful.

What was originally a Christian celebration of the resurrection of Christ, has now
turned into a stretched session of stuffing one's face with chocolate eggs.

And the worst is when I think I do well, but I don't get bountiful grades. To me, a 'B' is awful. When other people get one, I'm fine with it, and if it's the best grade that they achieve in the subject, well good on them for reaching it. But when I think of myself getting a B, the whole ground seems to just swallow me up ._. I think how could I be so stupid? Such a failure? Thankfully I only had one last year, but still :( Having only one kinda makes it even worse in a way though, if you get what I mean?

I'm hoping this year I can manage to stay a little more level-headed, but I'm getting a little jittery already; I cna't really imagine the state of me three months from now.

Song of the Day
Sanssouci by Rufus Wainwright
My sister showed me this song when we went to Berlin to see Sanssouci. Which means without a worry in French. Which is exactly what my sister looked like when she was listening to the song. It was a dream really; we were walking in the Autumn with the golden leaves falling around us on our way there and our parents close behind us. It was quiet, and my sister just looked so relaxed, high eyes closed; relishing the chorus of the song. I wish I could play the day again like I do with this song, just to wipe all the pain from her face nowadays.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfXGxyuSJpM

Tweet of the Day

London make-up teens, take heed - beauty?

On a slightly/very different note from my last few posts, what do you think of this image?:

I personally quite like it. I'm a sucker for bright, primary colours. And for some reason, the first word I thought of when I saw this, was 'peacock', even though the national bird of India is main composed of brilliant teal and green colours instead of this fuschia and red. But I just really like the way it looks! Obviously it wouldn't be a look I'd wear casually or in my day-to-day, but it really stops you in your tracks when you see it, doesn't it? I actually found this image whilst I was Googling 'Beauty', and I'm quite glad that most images were either the above or the below left instead of those of the below right kind.

Why am I glad? Because some girls need a bit of a slap with a tampon (sorry for any males reading this) and just look at what YOU ARE PUTTING ON YOUR FACE. I actually don't see very many orange-faced, scouse-browed teens or even adults around here in London. Just people who like to put extra clumpy mascara and very red, flushed cheeks. Oh and the foundation mask. The awful foundation mask. If you pick a foundation that's too pale, or too dark, at least have the decency to blend it out with the rest of your body! Even a few swishes along your neck would be fine!

And it doesn't help for you to keep piling on the concealer, when you are already breaking out because of it! Let your skin breathe girls. I get very confused about the thought of people who put on make up for school. If there's one place where you can let go cause you're with all your friends who won't judge you, it's school. Plus you'd be clogging up your face at least 5 days a week, and that can just wreck havoc on your face if you're not getting rid of it properly. Maybe it's just because I go to a girl's school, but I would have thought that looks would have mattered even more because if you can't be bitch about guys, there's always looks. Oh well.

The beautiful Rihanna on the other hand, at the 2013v Grammy's:

WOW <3

Obviously there are many, many things I could say about London teens, and I am thinking about doing a little series on here about them (and teens around the world in general), but I thought I'd start with the girls first and with my tendency to Google weird things. 

Favourite song of the Day:

Impossible cover by James Arthur

Got to admit, I didn't really like this song when I first heard it. I was too used to the original, but I love this twist on it as well!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mhj15W23IjA

Favourite tweet of the Day